It was only a matter of time before someone did it, but Curt Buthman, a formerly unremarkable marketing consultant from Los Angeles, has (supposedly) become the first person to use Twitter’s video-sharing application Vine to deliver a social media marriage proposal.
Buthman's girlfriend, Marsha Collier, was reportedly overjoyed and accepted his offer in less than 140 characters by tweeting "Um, uh, YES @curtbuthman – I will MARRY YOU!".
Given that the couple reportedly originally met on Twitter, it was probably a fitting way for Buthman to pop the question. Unsurprisingly, it didn't take long for the video to be shared across Twitter, and the couple have already promised to find a way to broadcast their wedding to online friends and followers.
Whether this is really the first Vine proposal is debatable, with other Vine users already challenging the claim that it hadn’t been done before. Perhaps it’s more accurate to say that Buthman’s proposal was the first to go viral and gain worldwide media attention.
While the proposal itself was standard (the ring was a family heirloom, but there were no elaborate dance routines or fireworks), it's open to debate as to whether using such a public and somewhat impersonal medium, to ask such an important and intimate question, is romantic or tacky.
Oversharing is caring
Surveys suggest at least a third of married couples exaggerate their engagement stories. But with Facebook, Twitter and Instagram so ingrained into daily life, retelling the story in your wedding speech just won't do - our increased interconnectedness and competitiveness demands hard evidence.
Statistics show more and more proposals are happening in public places, and even the ones that occur in private aren't staying private for long. With the explosion of social media, every moment of our lives can be documented and shared with family, friends and strangers virtually as it happens.
When it comes to major life events – especially ones that induce envy from friends, and bragging rights from the participants – there’s even more incentive to share and update. Add to this the prevalence of smartphones, meaning our social media access is portable and continuous, and the expectation to post milestones such as engagements increases.
Any Facebook user in their twenties or thirties has probably seen their share of ‘We’re engaged!’ status updates. These are usually followed by a photo of the ring, a change in relationship status, and a few hundred status updates between the engagement itself and the wedding day, concerning both the excitement and difficulty of planning said wedding. Which is not only a great way to keep wedding guests informed, but also the people who either weren’t invited and feel left out, or who weren’t invited and absolutely don’t care.
Viral proposals: cute or crass?
The rise of viral marriage proposals – including everything from flash mobs, to the rather disturbing trend of faking your or your intended’s imminent death – has put more and more pressure on would-be grooms to make the occasion memorable, unique and YouTube-able. It's possible the urge for grooms to share their feelings publicly may be due to the mistaken belief that she's more likely to say yes with public pressure, or because she'll think that an elaborate proposal means true love.
Of course, you don’t even have to be engaged to be sharing your dream wedding and proposal through social media. I’m looking forward to being a bridesmaid at the wedding of my currently-not-yet-engaged friend, who hasn’t let the lack of an official proposal stop her planning her big day on Pinterest. Perhaps seeing the flood of pictures from soon-to-be marrieds and newlyweds on our social media feeds has created a generation of future Bride-and-Groom-zillas, already scheming to out-do their friends when they walk down the aisle.
And if you need help planning the perfect proposal or wedding ceremony, there's an app for that: everything from wedding dress look books, to vow generators, to handy Wedding Countdown applications that you can use to irritate everyone on your Facebook friends list.
Still, despite our love of sharing, it seems there is a time and place for appropriate declarations of love. A recent survey showed 80% of people would turn down a proposal sent over Facebook, 63% would say no to a 'Jumbotron' proposal at a sporting or music event, and 57% would hate a flash mob proposal. So there's still hope for keeping what could be either one of the happiest or most heartbreaking moments of your life private.
If these public displays of affection are too much for you, remember that in the US approximately 40% of first marriages will end in divorce. Given our propensity for oversharing online, it’s possible that eventually you’ll get to watch that annoying couple’s marriage fall apart over your news feed.
Image: CurtButhman @ Twitter
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